🎃 What does a queasy pumpkin say? "I don't feel so gourd."
🎃 What do you call a fat jack-o'-lantern? Plump-kin.
🎃 Where do pumpkins live? In the seedy part of town.
🎃 Why are jack-o'-lanterns so smart? A candle makes them bright.
🎃 What is black, white, orange, and waddles? A penguin with a pumpkin.
🎃 Where does a pumpkin preach? From the pulp-it.
🎃 What do adventurous pumpkins do for fun? Go bungee gourd jumping.
🎃 What did the orange pumpkin say to the green pumpkin? "You look a little sick."
🎃 What did one pumpkin say to the other? "Happy Hollowing!"
🎃 Why do pumpkins sit on people's porches? They have no hands to knock on the door.
🎃 Why do pumpkins perform so poorly in school? Because they had all their brains scooped out.
🎃 What kind of romance do pumpkins enjoy? A mushy romance.
🎃 What's the problem with eating too much pumpkin pie this time of year? You'll get autumn-y ache.
🎃 When asked how he was feeling, what did the pumpkin say? "I'm vine, thanks!"
🎃 What did the pumpkin say to the pie baker? "Use apples, instead."
🎃 What did the pumpkin say after Thanksgiving? "Good pie, everyone."
🎃 What do you get when you drop a pumpkin? Squash.
🎃 Where do pumpkins hold meetings? In the gourd room.
🎃 What do you call a pumpkin that works at the beach? A life gourd.
🎃 What's a pumpkin's favorite genre? Pulp fiction.
🎃 What does a pumpkin use to repair its pants? A pumpkin patch!
🎃 Why was the jack-o'-lantern afraid to cross the road? It had no guts!
🎃 What did one pumpkin say to the pumpkin who asked where the patch was? Ah, a talking pumpkin!
🎃 How does a pumpkin listen to Halloween music? On vine-eel.
🎃 What's a pumpkin's favorite Western? The Gourd, The Bad, and The Ugly.
🎃 Why was Cinderella bad at football? She had a pumpkin for a coach.
🎃 What's the ratio of a pumpkin's circumference to its diameter? Pumpkin pie.
🎃What is a pumpkin's favorite sport? Squash.
🎃 Who helped the baby pumpkin cross the road? The crossing gourd.
🎃 What do pumpkins say at happy hour? Let's get smashed.
🎃 What did the jack-o'-lantern say to its barber? Surprise me!
🎃 What did the pumpkin say to its carver? Cut it out!
🎃 What do you call an athletic pumpkin? A jock-o-lantern.
🎃 How do you repair a broken jack-o'-lantern? Use a pumpkin patch.
🎃 Why was Cinderella sticky at the ball? Because she went there in a pumpkin!
🎃 Why was the jack-o'-lantern so forgetful? Because he's empty-headed.